We all seem to be seeking this form in some form or another. We may go our whole lives seeking this in our external circumstances. Whether it’s hopping from relationship to relationship hoping that someone else will be able to supply it. What I learned through emotional alchemy is that it isn’t in others that we find it but it is through transforming ourselves. By the transformation we discover that we actually have had it all along and it isn’t something anyone can take away from us.
Self-contentment is so powerful that it can be shared through compassion with others without the expectation of receiving it in return.
And because of this process, as a by-product, it is returned (not always but a lot of the time). How amazing is that?! All that needs to happen is a slight shift of perception of your currently belief that you need to find it out there (in the world).
We have to ask ourselves if this is true. And if it is true then why hasn’t it been found?
Emotional Alchemy In This Process
Here is what we need to see. It is that other people are not responsible for loving us. We are responsible for loving us. And when I say we are responsible, I mean loving ourselves completely. This includes even our “shadow sides”, you know… the part that keeps showing itself through other people we come into contact with that makes us so uncomfortable.
It is only when we see that we have these qualities inside as well is when emotional alchemy can take place and the change inside can happen. No one wants to be awoken from their delusion or dream until that dream turns into a nightmare. This is where it can get into the nitty gritty and could become mentally uncomfortable.
This seeing is a sign of health, it means we are facing ourselves completely and bringing compassion to ourselves and give opportunity for changing if desired.
“…Why does not one admit his failings? Because he’s still deep in them. It’s the person who’s awakened who recounts his dream, And acknowledging one’s failings is a sign of health.” – Seneca
It’s fascinating that I had ran away for so long from this practical teaching in my everyday life thinking that by running away it would be easier. But I found that by avoiding it, it actually has the opposite effect over time. When we gain courage and bravery to see our shortcomings, although mentally painful, is the cure to the feeling of being helpless and lonely.
When I became my own support, my own best friend; I saw that tackling obstacles like this was much more easier. Bringing this level of mindfulness to ourselves is for the health of not only ourselves but to others that we relate to. Through this emotional alchemy our movement of self-contentment begins to grow. And instead of poisoning each other with unconscious reaction; we begin to cure each other through conscious response.